Enjay08’s Weblog
We often feel alone during times of trouble. God doesn’t want that. He promises to always be with us.Shield of Faith
I’m a SciFi fan. Futuristic movies and TV shows often have protective shields available for protecting ships and individuals against the enemy’s weapons. How wonderful! The protected can go about their business in absolute safety. That’s the idea even though the shields are often pierced or disabled in battle.
But here in the real world we all know that there is no absolute protection from physical dangers. No place in the world is safe from hurricanes, tornados, earthquakes, floods or fire. Natural disasters happen everywhere. Physical dangers are even more prevalent. Disease, accidents, and crime affect millions everyday.
So what is this scripture talking about? (. . . above all, taking the shield of faith, with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. Ephesians 6:16) Faith is a spiritual tool, right up there with truth, righteousness, the gospel of peace, salvation, the word of God, prayers, supplication, watchfulness, and perseverance. (also from Ephesians 6.)
And who is this wicked one the scripture speaks of? Satan, who desires to prevent us from knowing God, or if we know Him, to prevent us from growing and witnessing.
So, the shield of faith is a guarantee against spiritual attack on what really matters – our relationship with God. But the believer must put faith into play. How strong is your shield of faith? It is tested everyday, in small or large ways.
We live in a physical world, but we also exist on a spiritual level and that should be the focus of our lives. We need to learn and grow in our spiritual relationship with our Creator, the God of the universe and our Savior, Jesus Christ.
. . .but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance. . . Romans 5:3
Troubles are proof of a spiritual battle. Just as a body temperature can be evidence of an invisible infection. Trials are a blessing once we know what is really going on and fight the spiritual battle with the weapons God provides. Use your shield of faith.
A New World/A New Year
Hello World, Happy Birthday to me!!!
This past year has been extraordinary. A very mixed bag of good and bad. The good far outweighs the bad.
Highlights of the year:
Last year’s birthday present – cancer. (imagine this list sung to the tune of: And a Partridge in a Pear Tree.)
Three Pet/Cts, three MRIs, tons of blood work (ouch), two surgeries, gallons of chemo, three stays in the hospital, weeks of radiation, dozens of visits to the doctors, stacks of paid (thank God) medical bills, Shingles, chemo fatigue, mastectomies, hysterectomy (now I can’t get hysterical anymore-whew!), dozens of trips to the pharmacy, xrays, visiting nurses in my home, a slew of new doctors, undressing and dressing quickly, lots of climbing onto exam tables, more medical jargon than I ever wanted to know, pills and pills, well you get the picture.
Thank God: all local docs – within three miles, great insurance and the money to pay for it – sometimes right from God’s storehouse to my bank account, miraculous intervention on financial and insurance issues, wonderful friends, great medical staff, the technology to fight cancer, God’s many mercies to me and loving care, even for MS which I think masks any pain I might have, opportunities to testify to God’s goodness, being used to touch others’ lives, suffering for Christ’s sake, time to read the Bible and pray, learning to see God’s multitude of blessings everywhere, (later I’ll tell you about the special flowers God planted all over my yard), and on and on!!!!
When I entered CancerLand, I entered a new world. I knew I couldn’t handle cancer by myself, so I handed it over to God and told Him to use this trek and myself for His purposes. I had no idea how He could use me or this experience, but I soon found out.
He has blessed me, this is true, but more than that He has blessed others through me. His love has truly flowed through me. This doesn’t mean I am special or great. . . (heaven forbid) but that I have yielded to God. This is what He wants. He gave us free will but we can’t be truly free until we give it back to Him. His will is better than anything we can come up with on our own.
God is so good, He IS goodness and pure love. I pray that you know Him.
13 For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
Psalm 139:13 (New King James Version)
Flowers from Heaven
You’ve heard of manna from heaven and pennies from heaven, but I want to tell you about flowers from heaven.
Every morning when I look into the back yard it is covered with large yellow flowers; not year around of course, but this is the season. They have appeared daily for over a week now. You can look for their source and not see a thing. They appear from nowhere.
If you look closely, squinting into the sky, you can spot a few yellow blooms high in one of the trees in the yard. There is a tiny vine growing up the side of the tree which twines itself throughout the leaves and branches. From the ground they are almost invisible and certainly do not seem abundant. Yet everyday there are dozens of blooms decorating the grass.
This vine is not something I planted. Nor was it in the yard when I moved in. Some little bird probably dropped a seed and it fourished, protected by the large golden rain tree. Slowly it grew up the side of the tree and many times I thought about cutting it down, not knowing what it was. That would have been a loss.
There are many mentions of flowers in the scripture. God directed the builders of the tabernacle to decorate the fixtures with carvings of various flowers and plants. Obviously God loves flowers and He made them for us to enjoy.
The flowers appear on the earth; The time of singing has come, …Solomon 2:12
What a sweet little blessing and reminder of God’s presence and his desire to shower us with blessings.
I hope you will open your eyes for the blessings God sends. Share them with me if you like.
God Bless
Wallowing in the Goodness of God
Sorry for the gap in entries. Life has been full of STUFF. As usual, I’m reporting on the wonderful Blessings God mixes in with the stuff.
For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him Matthew 6:8
It’s really true that God knows our needs long before we do, and He doesn’t just sit idly by; He is constantly preparing for our needs.
Very shortly before Cancer struck me, I was introduced over the phone to a niece I didn’t know. We started talking and emailing. God was preparing us both for an opportunity to minister to each other.
When God acts, everything is ready. Recently, in the space of a week, seeming like a bolt of lightning, things fell into place and she came to visit/meet me. The details would fill a book, but suffice it to say that God is using us to benefit each other in wonderful ways. He is in control.
How comforting to know that God, out of His extraordinary love for us, is always thinking and preparing for us, although many times we are totally unaware. Of course the only way to benefit fron His goodness is to submit to His love and His will. Sounds scary and unnatural, but that is what He desires and His will is ALWAYS good.
O Lord of hosts, blessed is the man who trusts in You! Psalm 84:12
Hope your day is blessed.
you can contact me at: nora56 (@) excite.com just write this as an email address without the ( ) and spaces
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No Bother – Really
Without God I could not face even one new day. I am constantly running to Him in prayer, asking for strength, courage, and mercy. Suprisingly He always gives me more than I ask for – indescribable joy, peace, friends and humor.
I remember a time when I tried to pray at least once a day, usually before closing my eyes in sleep. That seemed like a good idea. Sometimes I was so tired that I just went to sleep. Or too preoccupied with a problem that I couldn’t turn off my thoughts. Or I just forgot.
I always felt guilty about that, but really, what did I have to say worth bothering God?
For believers, the scriptures telling us to take all our problems to God are abundant.
“Casting all your care on Him; for He careth for you.” 1Peter 5:7
“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.” Phillipians 4:6
Yet we strive to solve the problems ourselves, not wanting to be dependent on God. Being dependent is bad, right? Humans are supposed to be independent, making decisions, solving problems on our own. That’s what the concept of free will means, isn’t it?
God sees it from a different point of view. He created us for communion with Him. He desires our love, our obedience and yes, our dependence. His plan is always better than ours. His solutions are brilliant. His desires are good. When we do run to Him and give Him the troubles in our life, He is free to work His beautiful will.
Learning to depend on God is part of learning to love and trust Him. Accepting that He desires a close, constant relationship with each person. Knowing that He is always ready to listen to us and to work His will in our lives, if we are willing. We aren’t bothering Him when we bring our concerns to Him and submit them to His will. That is what He wants.
When we start communicating with God and submitting to His will, He releases unlimited Joy to our heart
“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:3
How often to you talk to God? As often as you talk to your friends?
email: nora56 (at) excite.com (replace (at) with @
…Keeps Going and Going and Going
People ask me: ‘What next?’ It does appear that troubles keep hitting me one after the other. Sometimes two at a time. It would be so easy to give up, to throw up my hands in despair and stop trying.
But whenever I feel like that, and I do sometimes, the Holy Spirit whispers: Trust God. I’ve learned to obey that whisper. I pray and give my troubles and fears to God asking Him to work His will.
It is easy to say, ‘don’t be afraid’. And it is important to learn that we don’t have to live in fear. But, for my part it takes some hard work, and it needs to be done over and over.
So when trouble keeps going and going, I remind myself that with God’s help and mercy, I can keep going and going.
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
Sounds like going and going and going!!!
God Bless
Oh, if you would like to write to me, you can reach me at nora56 (at) excite.com Replace (at) with @
Bumps in the Road
NOW:
Radiation was rolling along just fine. Then I saw my breast surgeon for a checkup and he sent me for an ultrasound of my leg. He thought it was larger than the other leg. Then he sent me to the hospital (blood clot). I’d been this route before and knew it could mean a week in the hospital waiting for my blood to thin. That meant missing 5 – 7 treatments.
The radiation doctor assured me that a break in treatment could be a good thing for my skin. (It had suddenly turned bright red the day I entered the hospital.) By then I had talked to God and given Him my fears and frustrations and asked Him to use me if He could. He did!
God never wastes a thing, even a stay in the hospital. He rolled at least three things together and accomplished them in that week. He turned that week into an incredible experience, and not just for me.
Bumps in the road can be bad. They can cause damage to you and your car, or they can slow you down a little and reassure you that you have good shocks.
“Casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” 1Peter 4:5
THEN:
DejaVu, sort of. When I was being diagnosed with MS in 2002, I had three hospitalizations. The last was for a leg blood clot. I was staying in Georgia with family at the time and the third time in the hospital seemed like one more in an unending series of bad things.
But by then I had learned to trust God with this stuff, and soon after I left the hospital I was ready to go home, to Florida. I was supposed to reclaim my job after using my Family Medical Leave on May 5th, and my family dropped me off the weekend before. I made it back to work, barely able to get through the four hour days at first. But, I got stronger and eventually took a full time job at the same program.
Letting God be in control doesn’t mean a smooth ride, but it does mean that God knows about the bumps before you do and will prepare you and be with you.
God Bless
No Fear
Now:
Looking back over that last seven months I have been struck by the fact that I have not experienced fear. There are many scriptures that tell us not to be afraid. Here are a few: http://www.geocities.com/chrispelczar/bib.fear.html
I have been clinging to scriptures like these for years and especially now during this battle. God has been so faithful to keep His promises and has carried me through all that has happened fearless. I haven’t worried about the procedures, the treatments, the surgeries, and that says a lot since I have been a serious worrier most of my life.
I think learning to trust God is a process, taking little baby steps, and then taking more. He rewards our attempts, our faith and trust in Him.
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you. (1 Peter 5:6-7)
THEN:
I learned I had MS in 2002. That’s another story. But the most important thing I learned, quickly, was to Trust God, take my worries and concerns to Him and let Him take control of the solutions. As with the current situation, He did and in many miraculous ways.
There was a problem with insurance coverage since I temporarily went to live with my daughter in another state. The insurance company had assured me that I could take my coverage with me for a minimum of three months under special ‘visiting’ arrangements. So I confidently moved.
During my first hospitalization I received a phone call saying that they wouldn’t cover me, that I should never have been told I could move. This caused a flurry of phone calls, and discussions. I was urged to get a lawyer.
Then I remembered the scriptures someone had given me. I kept repeating them and decided I could trust God in this matter. I turned it all over to Him to work out according to His will. My phrase of faith became: ‘God will work this out.’ And He did.
I received another phone call from someone who apologized and said that they had made a mistake in telling me I would have coverage, but that they would cover my expenses according to the plan, anyway. I considered that a direct intervention on God’s part.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. (Philippians 4:6)
Bringing it to pass
NOW:
Sunday, a day of rest, a day to prepare for another week. They go by so swiftly it is unbelievable. Tomorrow starts another week of seeing doctors and radiation treatment. Every day seems like a challenge and every day God sees me through it.
Every new day is a question mark. The first day of the rest of my life. That’s true for everyone, but when you are ill, it really looms large. I have to give that question mark to God. I don’t know the answers or the outcome. But He does. I choose to commit it to Him. In return He takes care of the details and gives me peace and joy. He really does. His peace can’t be described or explained and the joy is the same.
THEN:
Commit your way to the Lord. Trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass. Psalm 37:5
Talk about working things out or “bringing it to pass” – I’ve watched God work out some tough situations. In November I was in chemotherapy, barely dragging myself out for treatment and follow-up, and suddenly everything screeched to a halt. I had shingles. They couldn’t continue chemo until that was over and the blisters went away. Then, in the middle of dealing with the pain of shingles, my cervix and uterus collapsed, causing problems with my bowels.
Now I needed breast surgery and a hysterectomy with reconstruction work. Which would come first? On the one hand we needed to remove the tumor. On the other, I was having great difficulty with my bowel function. I prayed, as usual.
This is how He worked this out. My breast surgeon suggested I have the hysterectomy (by another surgeon) at the same time as the mastectomies. Sounded good to me. One hospital stay instead of two. Two problems solved at once. Of course I was apprehensive of one surgery, not to mention two, all at once. But I had given the problem to God, and I gave Him the fear, too.
So the shingles went away, I finished chemo and we coordinated the surgeries. Early in December I went to the hospital, not knowing what to expect from the combined surgeries, but not fearful. Nurses and friends couldn’t believe we were doing it all at once. But, He worked it out. I came home after 2.5 days, virtually pain free and recovered nicely.
But let all those rejoice who put their trust in You. Psalm 5:11
originally posted 1-27-08
Laughing all the way
NOW:
Laughter is a blessing. God made us in His image and I think that includes the ability to laugh. Some of us can see humor in anything, even trouble and tragedy.
I laugh a lot. The techs at radiation like to laugh and we laugh together often – about the coldness of the boluses they lay on my chest or about the tattoos and markings they make on my chest. I make jokes about myself and laugh at the insane nonsense involved in getting well.
It really is funny to me, because I know how it will all end. God has already made a promise to me that it will be all right. Not necessarily the cancer or life here on earth. But I think that an eternity with God will be ‘all right.’ And laughter makes everything better, even here on earth.
Are you spending eternity with God?
THEN:
When I first discovered the huge growth in my breast I tried to pretend it was nothing. An infection maybe, or a fluid filled cyst. But I soon realized that I had to see a doctor, and that it probably was the worst thing – cancer. I prayed a lot; first that it would go away, then that it would be nothing, finally that God would just take control and work it out the way He wanted. I think that is the key. Once we can truly turn it over to God and give Him permission to work things out, then He is free to make miracles. Bad things really can be okay. You really can smile and laugh at them.
“If God be for us, who (or what) can be against us?” Romans 8:31
Who indeed? But, God isn’t automatically ‘for’ everyone. He wants to be, but since He gave us free will and the right to reject Him, we have to seek Him out and give ourselves back to Him. He made us, we turned away, we have to go back. Jesus is the way to do that. Without His sacrifice there would be no way to approach God.
Brushing coat tails with Death has made me cherish life and pray for all those who are still resisting God.
Eternity is a long time to go without laughter.
